Recently, I was having a conversation with a family member about someone else who was suffering with anxiety to the point that he quit his job. My family member said that this person should “just get over it” and go find another job. Obviously, this led to a discussion about why people with an anxiety disorder can’t “just get over it,” and that by saying such statements, a person with severe anxiety can become even more isolated and less likely to seek treatments that can help a person who is suffering begin to feel better.
All of us feel anxious in certain situations or under certain circumstances. Giving a big speech in front of a lot of people, having to tell someone something unpleasant or something that may anger the other person, when we are late and stuck in traffic, or when we are waiting for something to happen are all times when we may feel anxious. Additionally, anxiety can be protective like when a dog is lunging at you and you react so that you are not injured. This is not anxiety that interferes with daily living.
Anxiety disorders cause dysfunction in daily life and cause distress because of the dysfunction. Generalized Anxiety Disorder is an example of an anxiety disorder which consists of persistent, excessive, and unrealistic worry about everyday things per the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders-5. This type of anxiety can focus on many aspects of life, is excessive, difficult to control, and often comes with many physical as well as psychological symptoms. Symptoms have to be present for at least six months before Generalized Anxiety Disorder can be diagnosed. By telling someone to “just get over it” anxiety may worsen because they now typically have anxiety about the anxiety.
Anxiety disorders can be treated. If you have a friend or family member who is experiencing what may be an anxiety disorder encourage them to get professional help. Therapists have techniques that they can use and teach the person to do at home that can help reduce anxiety. There are non-addictive medications that can treat anxiety too. If your friend or family member is not ready to seek professional help, there are things that you can help them do at home including: be there to talk with them without judging, practicing deep breathing with them to slow heart rate and lower blood pressure thereby making the body feel more calm, participate in physical activity together whether that is a walk, yoga, or some other activity, or practice activities (grounding activities) that help them focus on what is happening in the present moment.
Educate yourself about anxiety disorders before telling someone to “get over it.” You would encourage someone with heart disease or arthritis to get treatment so they can begin to feel better and you should do the same with someone who has an anxiety disorder.
