There is a true phenomenon known as Southern Hospitality that is alive and well. There is something special about the way people treat one another in the south. It is much more than a cliché; it is a way of life. People in the south know how to make you feel at home and it is deeply rooted, for it has been passed down for generations.
One of the defining characteristics of southern hospitality is it is all inclusive. It doesn’t matter if you’re rich or poor, in the South everyone is treated with the same level of respect and kindness. Southern hospitality places a strong emphasis on family and community. They look out for their neighbors and offer a helping hand when needed. The sense of community is reflected in the way that people treat their guests. When you’re in the South, you’re not just a visitor, you’re part of the family.
Several years ago, my childhood friend, Kathy Byrd, went to visit her mother, Katy West, who at that time lived in an apartment complex. When she arrived at her mom’s apartment, she parked her car, grabbed her purse and headed to Katy’s front door. She knocked on the door, but no one answered. She looked in Katy’s designated parking space and then realized that Katy’s car was gone. It was before the days of cell phones. She must have just missed her. As she headed back to her car, Kathy was overcome by the smell of something good cooking in one of the apartments in the complex. She walked to find the apartment where the scent was the strongest. She didn’t know who lived there but she did know they were cooking something wonderful on the other side of the door. She waited a moment to identify the aroma and then knocked on the stranger’s door.
Robin Huff answered the door and Kathy’s first words to this stranger were, “What are you cooking that smells so good?” Robin answered with a smile, “Pinto beans, cornbread, mac and cheese, greens, fried potatoes and pork chops. It’s just about ready so come on in and eat with me.” And so she did. Kathy went right into the apartment of this stranger, ate at her table, left with a covered plate and also left with a new lifelong friend. That’s just how folks do it in the south.
We treat guests as family in the south. There are no strangers, just friends we haven’t met yet. It’s not unusual to hear someone say, “Have a blessed day” or telling everyone “Hi” as we wave at strangers and cars passing by. We hold doors open for folks even before they get out of their car. When our gardens come in, we share the bounty with our neighbors. If your house burns down, we immediately find a box and see what we have two of in our house that they could use. Church bereavement committees are ready in a moment’s notice to assist a family with food, both in the home and after the memorial service for the family and out of town guests when a loved one passes away. We mow a neighbor’s grass during an illness as well as come to a complete stop as we move to the shoulder of the road to let a funeral procession go by. Sweet Tea is a staple.
Anne Nighbert told me a story once about Doc Prater in Jellico. Dr. Charles Prater was an iconic figure in Jellico and the surrounding area. He and his wife Nancy came to Jellico in 1946 and stayed there until 1993. He was the backbone of the old Jellico Hospital and was beloved in the community. Years ago, Anne was very sick and went to see him. After an examination he gave her a prescription to make her feel better. She said she couldn’t take medicine for she had four small kids to take care of and her husband, Kenny, was the pharmacist at the drug store in Jellico and could not leave work. Doc Prater insisted she take the medication. She asked if it would make her sleepy or tired. He assured her it would be fine, and she needed the medication to get better. She filled it, took it and a bit later she was beyond exhausted. She called him and when he got on the phone, she quickly began to tell him that the medication had made her so tired that she could not even hold her head up. He told her not to worry; he was on his way to her house. He arrived quickly, and once he got there, he told her to immediately go to bed, he would watch the children himself until Kenny got home. And he did. He and the four rambunctious children had a splendid time. It was Southern Hospitality at its finest hour.
There were several Homecoming Church events over the last few weeks in the area. This weekend I attended a Homecoming at Watsons Chapel Baptist Church at Watts Creek in Williamsburg. I attended this church as a child and have written about it in my book. The pastor, Marty Huddleston, directed me to park in the front of the building, giving me the best parking spot in a totally filled parking lot even though I was one of the last to arrive with only minutes to spare before the service began. I sat with my forever friend Jenny Smith as her husband, Jabe Smith, preached the morning service. Afterward, we had a homecoming meal that consisted of the best of the best. It was like the parable of the loaves and fishes, even after everyone ate, there was still an abundance of food.
Crystal Gayle Dotson was there with a full tray of her famous “Crystals Cupcakes.” She bakes them, sells them and I had never had one, but I kept my eye on that tray of goodies. I got carried away talking to people while we ate and when I went back for dessert, they were all gone. I made my way to where Crystal was seated and told her the cupcakes looked so good while they were there, but I was too late. A lady who was seated at the same table spoke up quickly. She said she had two and gave me one right off her plate. I protested vehemently but she insisted. I’m glad she insisted, for that lemon blueberry cupcake was one of the best I ever tasted, it was utterly delightful. The entire layered events of the day were the epitome of true Southern Hospitality.
