Suicide.
I daresay there are few people, who haven’t known someone that killed themselves.
I am no exception.
A few years ago, a friend of mine died by suicide less than 24 hours after I last saw him.
I had gone over to the courthouse to speak with an official and bumped into my old friend, who was there to see the same official. We sat around for probably 30 minutes waiting for the official to get done with something so we could speak with him.
We talked about life and my friend talked a lot about his wife and daughter quite a bit. He seemed perfectly fine. I didn’t have a clue that anything was wrong with him.
Finally, the official that we were waiting to speak with had gotten a break. What I needed was only going to take about two minutes so I talked with the official first and left leaving my friend to speak with him.
It was the last time I saw him.
The next morning I was sitting in the News Journal office when Trent Knuckles came in the door and informed us that the friend, who I had been speaking to for half an hour the prior day, had killed himself.
I was floored. I was in shock.
“I just spoke to him less than 24 hours ago!” I exclaimed.
To this day, it still bothers me to think about it.
I think that it probably always will.
A few years later, a friend of mine stopped by my office and confided in me that after his wife died, he had emotionally gotten low. I mean really low. He had thought about killing himself.
Before he left that day, I made him look me in the eye and promise that if he ever got that low again that he would call me before he did anything.
He promised me that he would. I’ve lost touch with this friend over the years, but a few years ago he got remarried, and last I heard he was doing well.
Sometimes when someone is planning to kill themselves, they will appear perfectly normal.
Other times there are warning signs, such as someone giving away prized possessions or quitting things that they are involved with that they enjoy.
I remember one friend posting on Facebook one time that they were quitting some organizations that they were involved in. I got a little concerned, so I sent an e-mail to the friend noting that I had seen this and just asked if he was OK.
As it turned out, he was fine. He was planning to attend graduate school and was just trying to simplify his life before he did so. He thanked me for asking though, and noted that I was the only person, who did.
September is National Suicide Prevention Month. Most years during the month of September, I try to write a version of this column in hopes that it will help someone.
If you know someone, who is struggling and you are concerned about them, then reach out. Make a phone call, send a text, drop them an e-mail. Just let them know that you are thinking of them.
Let them know that someone cares.
If you are thinking about taking your own life, then I would say please don’t. If for no other reason, than because of the impact it will have on your friends and loved ones.
I guarantee it will have a negative impact on at least one person that you care about.
Also, if you are thinking about taking your life, please know this. Sadly, you are not alone. Suicide is the 10th leading cause of death overall in the United States and is the second leading cause of death for people ages 10-34. In Kentucky, there is a death by suicide every 11 hours.
If you are thinking about ending your life, please know there are resources available and people you can speak with.
Among other resources, the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline can be reached 24 hours a day by dialing 988. Texting and chatting with 988 is also available for people in a mental health or substance use crisis.
To anyone reading this column, who is thinking about or planning to kill themselves, I would say please call or text 988 first.
Look at it this way.
What do you have to lose?
